Paralyzed by Goals and Planning

To get yourself out of a rut you have to want something.  You have to want that something enough to elicit a change.  This is no easy task.  Truth be told, people get comfortable staying where they are, even if it’s miserable.  People cling to familiarity.  They know exactly what to do and expect.  There is a gratification in perpetuating a situation because at least you’re imparting some kind of control.  Keeping things the same saves them from getting worse.

Being content with what is gets justified if you’ve lived through the abominable.

According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, you can’t get grow if your current status is unfulfilled.  You also can’t skip steps.  If you’re starving or just kicked out of your home, you’re not going to care much about fulfilling your potential.  You’ve got to get food and find a place to stay.  If you look for another person to give this to you (belongingness and love) you’re not going to be able to keep it on your own accord.  You become a enslaved to charisma instead of self-confidence.

MASLOW’S HIERARCHY OF NEEDS
photo credit: figur8.net
MASLOW’S EIGHT STEP MODEL 
photo credit: consciousaging.com

People don’t want better because they’re not sure it exists.  Not for them.  And if they do believe that better is possible, they don’t know how to get there.  Not doing is not knowing and vice versa.  Fate is out of their hands and they are frozen into inactivity.  Either the universe will pull you up or push you down; individual choices and behaviors are irrelevant.

On the other hand, there are believers who get so obsessed with plans of perfection they never actively pursue the goal itself.  They get stuck in a cycle of learning but miss out on the ever important application.  Uncovering the finite details becomes the quest.

But people get lost in the details when they’re just beginning.  They get swallowed up by specificity, confusing the molehill for a mountain.  Someone suffering with a lack of motivation doesn’t need minutia. They need general ideas and understanding.  A head nod of a concept gets you to lace your shoes and try. Down the line, when they’ve already developed the working habit of self-improvement, discovering the particulars will keep them coming back for more.

So take a step.  Any direction will do.  It’s not about right or wrong.  It’s about leaving where you’re at.



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